

Now hereâs an idea from antiquity that we moderns could really benefit from adopting! Although the Egyptian pharaohs were considered as gods by their subjects, usually in the 30th year of a pharaohâs reign and every three years after that, he had to prove his worth by participating in a footrace during the Heb-Sed or Sed festival! During this observance, they might construct temples and sculptures. The tradition dated back to the first dynasty of ancient Egypt, around 3,000 BCEâŠ
Now it gets better! The pharaoh while competing was dressed in a kilt with an attached animal tail! I am so enviousâŠthey had animal-headed deities, plus their king got to act like a furry, all to demonstrate their physical fitness for office! If a pharaoh couldnât complete the race, it meant that it was time for a younger, healthier ruler as the ancient Egyptians related the health of their head honcho to the overall health and vitality of the kingdomâŠ
Since 30 years was a long time against the life span of an ancient Egyptian, only a small percentage of pharaohs lived long enough to celebrate a Heb-Sed, and many kings and queens were troubled with various maladies caused by inbreeding. Still, the idea of running a footrace to prove physical fitness might be worth incorporating into the American political system. Healthy mind in a healthy body, âya know. Iâll bet that Kamala could have run the courseâŠI doubt that the Orange Dude would have. Iâd race, if I got to wear a fox tailâŠbetter a partial fursuit than none, I always sayâŠ
All of this shows us once again why the ancient Egyptians rocked!
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I normally donât like writing âCurrent Eventsâ pieces (and greatly prefer focusing on what SEO grifters like to call âevergreen contentâ), but I feel this warrants it.
Content warning: Violence, death, mentions of political extremism.
Imagining living under constant threats of having your house burned down for 2 years, because your neighbors hate that you and your spouse are both male.
Then, one day, they make good on the threats and burn your house down, forcing you to move away. You return to the charred remains to check your mail, only to notice the skull of one of your dogs and its harness displayed in full view. As you try to process your loss, a neighbor walks up shouting homophobic slurs.
And then he pulls a gun and fires at you both, killing your spouse.
This isnât some apocryphal, tragic tale from the 20th Century during the early Gay Rights movement.
This is the story about the death of the actor that, among other things, voiced a King of the Hills character.
This is a story that the mainstream media widely downplayed as merely âdies in shootingâ. You can read what really happened from Jonathan Jossâs surviving husband.
Meanwhile, people on Social Media are claiming victory over Pride Month, even going as far to say its absence from Target is a sign that âwe are healingâ. Targetâs new direction for June (and their recent âanti-DEIâ stance) were the direct result of Donald Trumpâs election in November. Trumpâs movement called itself Make America Great Again (MAGA).
So I must ask the people who supported this movement: Was the manner in which Jonathan Joss was tormented and ultimately killed evidence of America being âgreatâ?
What does it even mean to be âgreatâ?
So many people want to think of us as great, but nobody talks about what that actually means. âNobody wants to help mom do the dishes.â
Iâd argue that America is truly at its greatest when even its most vulnerable and most freaky citizens can make ends meet and live their fucking lives in peace.
I grew up around red-blooded, patriotic Americans. They had their own kind of Prideânot the gay kind: Proud to be an American. Weâre the Land of the Free, so they happily called it.
But hereâs the thing: no one is free until everybodyâs free.
This is actually very easy to understand, if you try:
If there exist any unfree people on the Earth, then all someone malicious has to do is declare youâre one of the unfree. If that happens, what are you gonna do about it? You need freedom to defend such accusations, and we just established those people are not free, and now youâre not, either.
But if everyone is free, there is no longer an unfree classification that can stick to you, and thus your freedom is preserved.
A lot of social media posts have been spun about the âparadox of tolerance.â Similar to that one, the paradox of freedom dissipates when you think about it for half a second, and all youâre left with is a social contract.
Even though itâs so easy to caricaturize and stereotype, a truly great person would seek to actually listen and understand someone different.
The worst kind of people are currently emboldened to enact violence against LGBTQIA+ Americans.
It would be great if you would stand with usânot as faggots, dykes, and whatever slurs are popular against transgender people todayâbut as neighbors, friends, cousins, siblings, parents, funny aunts and uncles, and whatever other relationship the English language didnât come equipped to succinctly describe in a sentence like this one.
If you truly believe in a greater America, you can only make it a reality by acting out of genuine love and compassion for Americans.
Hatred, prejudice, and violence do not serve any of us well.